Are you finding it hard to discipline your child? Using spanking as discipline is a question that many new parents are faced with. When you ask your friends or other parents, chances are that you will get emotional or strict replies. This can be very confusing, especially since as a new parent, you likely want to get everything right. Spanking as discipline is a matter of personal parenting styles. It can be a source of heated debate, with strong arguments on both sides.
What do they say?
According to many parents, spanking is a way to discipline the child, and controlled spanking is normal, accepted behavior. The reference of controlled spanking can also be found in the Bible, “He that spareth his rod hateth his son.” For many Christians, a swat on the back is considered fairly common as a form of discipline when the child misbehaves.
According to the experts, spanking is an acceptable way to discipline the child, except if it is done with anger and violence. If spanking is in moderation and done under a calm demeanor, there is no harm. If there is reason valid enough for the child to get a spank from their parents, they likely will learn from this experience and not repeat the offense that caused the punishment in the first place.
Who is on the opposite side?
There are many that believe that spanking can never be an acceptable form of discipline. According to them, a violent action from the parents can make the child learn violence. Corporal punishment can make the child violent and can induce negative feelings in the child. According to this side of the debate, spanking is not discipline, but a form of physical harm. With so many other methods to discipline children, there is absolute no need for physical punishment.
Is there a middle ground?
There are also many parents who are unsure of what should be done when a child does something wrong and needs to be punished. This camp of people are on the fence on this issue. They stick to the middle ground. They feel that spanking should be kept as a last resort when there is no other way left to discipline the child. This should never be the first choice of the parents.
What American Academy of Pediatrics says?
According to the AAP, to spank is “to strike on the buttocks with an open hand”. However, it has been found that parents reach for belt and brush to discipline children. These are sometimes physically and mentally traumatic punishments for the child. While some parents do it because they think that it is good for their child, some do it because they get angry and lose their temper. Thus, according to the Academy, spanking should not be harsh and cruel. It should be according to the faults that the child has done. It is noteworthy to say that the AAP states that spanking does not necessarily discipline the child or teach him or her responsibilities and obedience. It may in turn fill the reservoir of resentment against the parents, which can be detrimental for the relationship between the parents and the child.
Often children find out other ways to lie and ways to avoid getting caught when there is a fault. This is done in order to avoid a spank. This behavior can become a problem, as they may hide many important things from their parents for fear of getting punished. If you choose to spank as a discipline, you must be very careful. You should never do it in anger or because you have lost your temper. You should not be hard on your child both emotionally as well as physically.
Do you think that spanking should be a form of discipline?